just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
