I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
How does it feel to date your dad?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
