What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
