Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
