I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
be right there i have to get my cape
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
