i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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