hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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