Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
