Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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