I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
