normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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