Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
