I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
