This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
