It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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