every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
