What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
