btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
