the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
