This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
