So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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