I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
