seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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