Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
