The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
