He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize