The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
