Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
