he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
