Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
