So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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