I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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