What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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