i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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