Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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