Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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