I think my vagina is haunted
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
