Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
