clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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