what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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