You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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