yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
