It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
