I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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