the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
