Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
