He disabled his match.com account in front of me
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
