Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
