I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
organizing the empties. That sober.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
