You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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